I just thought I would write you a quick letter to inform you of a few things. Number one: Sporting handmade Aunt Becky bows the size of your head are always acceptable. Do not let Daddy tell you otherwise. Also, it would be much appreciated if you would leave the bows in and not try and put them in Homer's hair. He doesn't like to wear bows. He's a boy. And a dog. Neither boys nor dogs should wear bows. Again, don't let Daddy tell you otherwise.
Number two, banging on your piano is an acceptable form of play. In fact, it is encouraged. You may also bang on the real piano in the living room. However, jumping and walking on your piano is an unacceptable form of play. Piano's don't like to be jumped upon. It offends them. Likewise, jumping and/or walking on the real piano is not allowed - at any. age.
Yeah, go ahead, grin. I know you just did the Macarena on that little kitty piano of yours. Your cute grin won't fool me.
Number 3: Pretending to surf while sitting is incorrect. Please stand. It makes for a cuter photo.
Number 4: Face such as this...
..and even this, are utterly and completely adorable. They will not, however, make up for the fact that you just threw your monkey toy at Homer, promptly turned about and chucked another animal at Momma and then, loudly screeched a cry banshees would be jealous of. Throwing is also unacceptable - no matter how cute you are while doing it. I suppose throwing is acceptable as long as it is a ball. And said ball is being thrown with someone and not at them